In families with graduates, the last bells and graduation parties are important events. It is also close to all of us who once crossed the finish line of school life. Joy and sadness simultaneously, tears from parting with the best time of childhood and youth, the familiar faces of classmates and teachers… The most sincere feelings. They are unchanging in every generation.

But time changes colors and meanings. And in this regard, concern is growing in society – the content of these events year after year increasingly turns into a "vanity fair." The elementary showing off of certain parents eagerly trying to give them a pompous character, with huge baskets of flowers, publicly presenting their offspring with a new gadget or car keys…

And parent committees, also with enviable persistence, increasing collections for gifts for teachers, the principal, and in kindergartens – the head, the teacher, the music worker. Persistent and intrusive collections, resembling extortion.

ON A NEW APPROACH TO GRADUATIONS:

THE MINISTRY OF EDUCATION'S POSITION

And this against the backdrop that the current year was supposed to be different, because for the first time, the debate about "luxury graduations" moved from the category of parental disputes to the realm of official prohibitions.

The Ministry of Education of the Republic of Kazakhstan took a clear position on this issue, publishing on April 13, 2026, requirements for conducting graduation events in educational organizations. It implied a strict ban on lavish celebrations outside of schools, banquets in restaurants, sunrise gatherings, and most importantly – a ban on collecting money from parents.

The answer to the question: why did the ministry, which usually does not interfere in family traditions, take such a step? – seems obvious. It concerns social justice.

According to the requirements, it is forbidden to collect money from parents under any pretext, including organizing graduations, gifts, renting premises, and holding festive programs.

It is recommended to hold graduation ceremonies strictly within the walls of the educational organization. This excludes the participation of directors and teachers in events held in restaurants, cafes, and other external venues. Another measure is the strengthening of control by education authorities during the preparation and conduct of graduations, including monitoring parental complaints and social media posts.

The ministry explained that these measures are aimed at ensuring safety and public order during graduations and strengthening the "Law and Order" concept in educational organizations.

These restrictive and prohibitive measures did not arise from nowhere. Every year, the ministry receives complaints about excessive collections. Parents also write on social media that in some schools, families were asked for considerable sums for a "common celebration," amounts comparable to a monthly salary in many regions.

What feelings will this evoke in a single mother working as a salesperson or cleaner when a message appears in the parent chat asking to contribute, for example, "50 thousand each for a restaurant, gifts, and a limousine"? Refusing means her child will be made a "black sheep." But she doesn't have that money; she has debts, like many in the country.

The Ministry of Education considered the emergence of such a situation unacceptable. Therefore, the ban on collecting money from parents was not a bureaucratic whim but dictated by the protection of the rights of those who cannot publicly say "no."

WHAT EXACTLY IS PROHIBITED?

According to official clarifications, holding graduation events outside school buildings is not allowed. The following are prohibited: banquets in restaurants, cafes, and banquet halls; off-site excursions with rental cars and limousines; sunrise gatherings in nature or recreation areas; hiring animators, hosts, and party agencies for payment. And I will highlight separately – collecting money for gifts for teachers and school administration is prohibited.

The only permitted format is a ceremonial assembly within the school walls, in school uniform, but preserving the main traditions: the waltz, parting words, and a festive atmosphere.

INTERVENTION OR A NECESSARY MEASURE?

The requirements for conducting graduation events in educational organizations clarify the Ministry's position with three arguments.

The first and foremost is safety. After all, in recent years, graduations held outside the school, with "sunrise meetings," with a column of decorated cars, have repeatedly resulted in tragedies. These include group fights, rented limousines causing traffic accidents and other incidents. Therefore, it is safer to hold the celebration under school supervision and with police support.

The consequences of the financial burden on families were also a significant argument. Therefore, the ministry directly stated the inexpediency of spending on these events. A celebration should not turn into a competition of wallets, where a child from a low-income family feels disadvantaged.

And equally important is the attempt to restore the meaning of graduation as a farewell to school, teachers, and childhood, and that this is not a gala evening at an expensive restaurant or a photoshoot in front of a limousine.

Graduates should remember this moment, express gratitude to those who invested knowledge in them for 11 years. And at the same time, understand that gratitude is not measured in tenge.

Of course, opinions among parents are divided. Some believe that the state is interfering in the private affairs of families. But the majority support the new rules. For example, the mother of a graduate, Alma U., wrote that "the parents in our class did not want to hold events in expensive restaurants and were against collections. Everyone's means are different."

Thus, by revising the practice of conducting these events, the Ministry of Education opposed the pursuit of luxury, protecting not so much order as ordinary people. Those who cannot afford to throw away hundreds of thousands on one evening. School is not a place for a contest of parental budgets. The last bell should be with tears of joy, not with a feeling of shame for a modest bouquet. The celebration should be for everyone together. Otherwise, it is not a celebration at all.

However, as the last bells held last week showed, the issue of social inequality during school celebrations still remains acute. Although seemingly the same ribbons with the inscription "Graduate," elegant dresses, and flowers. A day of universal joy and pride.

But adults themselves introduce a line of social stratification into this picture, staging a race for pomp, competing over whose bouquet is bigger, whose limousine is longer, whose banquet is more expensive.

The argument seems harmless. What's the big deal? The child deserves it; it's his celebration, which must be arranged at the "highest level." But this "height" becomes unattainable for many. The painful side of the phenomenon is when one classmate comes to the assembly with a cascade of live roses, while another student holds a modest bouquet of three chrysanthemums. And at that moment, he feels inferior, deprived, "not like everyone else."

The school, which should be a place of equal opportunity, on the last day of its "authority" over the children, publicly demonstrates their family budgets. An unequal game for teachers as well, who silently draw conclusions: the one whose parents are more loved becomes the "king" of the ball. And what does a teenager feel, whose family cannot adequately present him at this parade of life? Shame. A bitter feeling of injustice and humiliation. And from this lesson, his journey into adulthood begins.

Adults must understand this. And honestly admit: huge bouquets and pompous events are not a manifestation of love for the child or respect for the teacher, but a demonstration of parental status. A vain attempt to prove one's worth to others. And children here become mere decoration or, worse, hostages to ambition.

Has anyone considered that a child who comes without a luxurious bouquet loses the magic of the last bell, experiencing a feeling of inferiority, suffering emotional trauma? After all, a 17-year-old teenager experiences social inequality acutely, and a spoiled school celebration becomes a blow to self-esteem at a moment when it is already fragile.

What to do? It takes courage to stop. Class teachers and school administration must regulate these processes: establish a "dress code" for bouquets (one flower or a modest arrangement), refuse restaurants in favor of the school auditorium and a buffet with a sweet table, for a symbolic sum.

School is ending. And the last thing it should teach children is that their value is determined not by the thickness of their parents' wallet. A common celebration should not become an auction.

And if we do not change the tradition now, our children will grow up with the belief that "expensive" means "good," and "modest" means "shameful." This is a false beacon that destroys more than we think.

The season of last bells and graduation parties cannot become a line beyond which sincere joy gives way to a race for status, a display of luxury, collective "sponsorship" for teacher gifts. All this is real, and no "stop signals" can yet fully stop the absurd ritual of publicly handing over an iPhone or car keys just because your child has crossed the school threshold. The phenomenon of "royal" bouquets, huge arrangements impossible to carry in one hand, worth several average salaries, and ordinary bouquets is that they all wilt by the second day. This is simply someone's business, not a tribute to the teacher or graduate.

Parents chip in because "it's customary." A demonstration of their capabilities, a show of "coolness," competition, and complexes. Who do we want to prove this to? That we are rich? That we are generous? That our child is "better"? Who can say when this became the rule, gradually perverting a pure and bright celebration?

But there are also good examples. When graduates spend the collected money on visiting children in orphanages, giving them sweets and toys, and receive much joy from the interaction. Or when they plant trees, creating a graduates' alley.

If we want to teach children to prioritize correctly, let's show them an example. And most importantly – let's not ruin their most important memories; let's make them beautiful and touching. After all, a modest, heartfelt tea party in the classroom, one living flower from the heart, and a touching envelope with a chocolate for the first teacher are enough. Everything else is a performance where everyone loses.

School is the first life experience for our children. It gives them a ticket to adulthood, where achievements are measured not by the height of a bouquet, but by the depth of knowledge and breadth of soul. And who among them has a brilliant future is unknown. Life is unpredictable. We know this well…

Akmaral ABDULOVA